Dreading Today

Today is one of those days I really would have preferred to stay in bed with my head under the comforter. I have a pounding headache and a knot in my stomach anticipating the phone call from the lawyer today. I don't want to talk about the accident, yet again, re-hashing the events, the details...my nightmare. I don't want to think about the what-ifs, why's, should-haves and could-haves. I don't want to question why it had to be YOU to be the nice guy and haul those people across the lake, by yourself. None of it will change the fact that you're gone.

I've been trying to give myself a pep talk...telling myself that I can do this, that I'm strong enough for these conversations again. I don't have myself convinced, yet, but I will get through it. Because it's my only choice.